For TXDW

I am copying responses here in addition to posting them in the comments
I always worry that people miss them when they are buried in the posting section

you really are not alone!
read on:

To TX DW: My heart goes out to you! 41 years is a long time. I have been gone from my husband for 2 months now, and yes, I was little more than the maid, cook, and verbal punching bag. Now that I am gone, he is paying someone else to do most of what I did. Hopefully he is not yelling at her when she comes to clean! I don't know what "normal" is anymore either. I was speaking to a friend of mine the other day about our separation. She said she understood, as she has never (?!) been happy in her marriage. I always thought they had a great marriage, and her hubby is not diabetic. Maybe we all have our own story to tell? Take care, and take the time to be good to yourself . . . Hugs, Lilly on Don't Lose Faith

And another one:

Definitely not alone. I've only been married and dealing with some of the scarier sides of diabetes for only 3 months. I wonder what it will be like in 40 years. My husband is actually pretty compliant, but it is exhausting playing nurse, housekeeper motivator, dietitian, mathematician... I can't comprehend what it will be like aa time and stubborness goes by

So, do what you need to do to take care of yourself!
we are here to offer support