Sunday, September 30, 2012

What's that Device?

Boop82 and Sandy both write very expertly about the diabetic devices their husbands use.
I am impressed.
Tom wears a CGM (continuous glucose monitor) and a pump
I don't know what brand or what style
while I've seen the demo's and some of the menu selections
he is expert at managing his devices and doesn't want (or need) my help
when he goes low -- the devices are not helpful or needed --
I do know how to disconnect the pump if I need to
if I were to ask (or look it up) he would tell me whatever I want to know
(I don't really want to know more)

with Tom, its like 20 questions
he answers every question
but doesn't offer much information beyond the answer to the question

this is his second or third pump and maybe his second CGM
can't really remember
the technology is remarkable and keeps getting better
he is waiting for them to develop the CGM and pump combined into a single small device

 of course, it is all very expensive
we are fortunate to have great medical insurance
although the one year we had to pay a greater share was much more difficult

thanks you guys,
keep writing and informing the rest of us....

Tom's Wife

Thursday, September 27, 2012

I hate the Fall

this is always a tough tie of year for me
I see it as a time of endings
Yeah, I know some people see it as beginnings
but I just see endings
end of summer
end of long days
end of green

on top of that it is really busy
people are rushing to get things done in the business world
before the holidays are here
some people are energized by it
I am drained by it

I am struggling with my work, with my mood, and with life in general
my dad is very ill and that makes me so sad...
while, physically he is still with us -- he is in so much pain, he just isn't here....
I visit him as often as I can
but I came down with the flu last weekend and had  to stay away for 10 days

my mom is being really strong (as always)
but everything is very difficult regarding them right now

I understand their desire for independence as much as possible
but my heart is breaking at the same time

I HATE the fall

end note to DW:  my heart is with you right now and is suffering with you also.  I wish you the strength to make the right decisions.  I'm certain you will figure it out -- but recognize how difficult the path may be....

just like I used to write

I hope that we (the wives of diabetics) get some rest tonight
for me -- that's a struggle  each night
I still check multiple times during the night to be sure Tom's is breathing
(he hates that!)

but I can't help it -- its who I am....

Sunday, September 9, 2012

and more sadness...

the 59-year old brother of a close friend
went to sleep on Thursday night
and didn't wake up on Friday morning

the funeral was today
the family is devastated

if there are more details I don't know them
he was cremated so no autopsy

my dad is at home
getting up in the morning
taking many pain pills
hardly eating
feeling pain

my mother watches him like a hawk
and tells people he is failing
that this is the beginning of the end

he doesn't want to walk further
than between his bedroom and the family room
and my mother won't

when I spoke with her today
she looked at me with such sad eyes
I had nothing to say
nothing to offer

I'm incredibly sad

Friday, September 7, 2012

which topic to write about?

I was going to write about traveling with a diabetic
at least one low each day :(

but I got home from a nice vacation and learned that my dad has taken a turn for the worse
I am sad tonight

just don't have the heart to write about anything else