Email Hell

For so many reasons I have had to change my email accounts...
It has been a mess
I finally have been able to see my own blogger account
but am having trouble following others' blogs

I have figured out a way to do it -- but it is not easy anymore
eventually I will figure it out...
but right now it has been very frustrating...

I'll get it
just give me time...

thank you

Thank you my dw friends... you support is gratefully appreciated

two weeks a the beach, why am I not happy?

Home from 2 weeks at the beach
I enjoyed it
really i did
it wasn't exactly what I had hoped for
too many people around (my sister invited lots of people)
but really it was so nice to be away
and I LOVE the beach

Tom arrived for the last three days
including our 27th anniversary
and, ON OUR ANNIVERSARY
we had an argument about money
he is worried about having enough to live on in our retirement
which is still 10 years away
and he is unhappy spending money on vacations now

what if we don't live another 10 year?
geez
and now I'm worried about my career/job/business choices
I'm already insecure in some of tem
he just added to it

now that I'm home I am feeling the burden of all there is to do
and do it all without spending any money because I just took the first 2-week vacation of my adult-hood

I feel like I should be happy but I'm not
is there something wrong with me?
maybe this week will be better....

Lilly, DW, Washington Post, Tom

Where should I start?
today was really crappy!
two more funerals to attend this week - relatives of relatives -- but still!

Lilly responded to my last post - Thanks Lilly -- you are a gem

DW - you are a hero -- doing amazing things with your life despite amazing odds

There was a very interesting article in today's Washington Post by someone describing living with his daughter's t-1 diabetes and the health insurance changes.  It was a well-written article something I recommend reading.

now to the Tom update.  he is having challenges managing his glucose -- high, low, high -- but the point is that he IS working at it and on balance is doing ok.  BUT, on Thursday in the midst of the horrible storms we had, Tom was hit by another car on his way home from work -- no one was hurt and it was clearly the other guy's fault.  The damage is going to be more than $3,000 and the kid who hit him wants to pay for it rather than go through insurance.  sounds fine on the surface.  but we don't know what it will cost and I am just not comfortable with loose arrangements on stuff like this.  I want the car fixed, I want to report it to the other guy's insurance company and get this done with.  I don't feel comfortable with all of the unknowns around doing it differently.  Ok, so you tell me to just let Tom handle it.  But he won't -- he works during regular business hours and I'm going to be away at the beach for two weeks.  we either tell the insurance company now or forget it.  Here is the kicker -- when we were talking about it tonight - Tom said to me: well, I need to balance your desires with those of the kid.  REALLY!!  The kid gets the same consideration as me??!!!!

and, he doesn't get it.  what's wrong?  what's the problem?  I'm so angry!!!

Family: Terrific and Awful!!

So, I love my family
but they do drive me crazy!
Tom is really my anchor -- when he is doing well with his meds
last night -- not so much
low and yelling -- it wasn't a nice evening

My sister -- plans for going to the beach?
i thought that was done and planned
today she is hesitating!
i am so frustrated
just make plans!!!!!

Another sister!
she is just out to lunch!
she asks my advice and then ignores me
and acts incredibly dumb
she isn't dumb but acts that way

And now I'm worrid about what to do for Father's Day
Should I be with my mom"
she says she doesn't care
but is that true????

I just don't know.....
feeling very stressed tonight.....

in idle

so here it is June and someone asked me "how's it going?"
That's a difficult question to answer

I'm doing "OK"
I have lost my fire, my drive
I find myself in getting along mode

my business is getting by
I'm doing what I need to do -- nothing special
I'm having a very challenging time making decisions

the past week has been spent trying to make plans for a two-week vacation t the beach with my sister
she has always had trouble making decisions
but this time I've been right there with her
so many choices, nothing exactly right
its been exhausting

I think we found something
hopefully we can finalize it this week

how are my friends in DW land?

Memorial Day Weekend 2013

I haven't posted in awhile because life has been busy
Between traveling for work = a lot
and supporting my cousin whose wife has been dying of a brain tumor
tonight she died
She was diagnosed the same day as my dad's funeral
it has been very difficult
and just trying to be "in" my life each day
some days are easier than others

This weekend my family will be gathering for another funeral
I hope to get some rest before everyone arrives
other than that it is going to be another tough weekend