A comment

Michael gave this response to my last post.

No, I don't find this fascinating. I find it difficult to comprehend. We have snippets of an article that are thrown together in a haphazard fashion, and it's not easy to follow what might have been fascinating initially because the full context isn't included. "Thinking something through is the end of reasoning..." Um, what? That completely defies the definition of what reason is -> the thinking, cognition, intellect, and way a rational person understands themselves and thinks about cause and effect, truth and falsehood, and what is good or bad. Overall, the point appears to be: work together, it's a partnership. If that isn't happening, and it can't be communicated, maybe there are some deeper issues going on that need to be addressed... Diabetes aside

Michael, I respect your input - you have a great perspective on diabetes.  These are not "snippets of an article thrown together in a haphazard fashion"  the only words left out refer to the specific person described.

I'm sorry if you didn't connect with the words - but I did.

you may be correct that there are deeper issues going on than just diabetes -- that happens very frequently

 but I still like it!

Profound Words

Just read an advice column on a totally different topic but it hit me right in the heart.
tell me what you think  I replaced the topic with the diabetic topic

"...your husband's behavior is way more egregious.  Acting unilaterally in a marriage is the heart of all betrayal.  Your comfort, standard of living, quality of life, finances, safety and goals, among other things are all linked now.  Your husband imposed his standards on you -- and compromised yours for you -- in every one of these categories when he acted without asking you.

The healthy, productive, forward-looking response to that isn't to suck it up and find a way to like it.  Its to explain to your husband that he negated your voice in your own home, to let him know that this is not acceptable, and to say that the conversation isn't over until you have both had your say.

... since he has been .[diabetic].. for all of x months [or years], its possible he hasn't fully processed what it means to share a life.  thinking something through marks the end of the reasoning process, it becomes a habit.  But that gets the [diabetic] person only halfway through at best. 

so point out to your husband that he skipped the part where you and he reconcile your two carefully drawn conclusions and come to a decision you both can embrace.  "

do you also find this fascinating????

Machines that keep them Going

Tom (and I) met with a sales person for a new pump, meter, and monitor last night
I have to say that I'm very impressed with Tom
he has been really doing his research
I shouldn't be surprised -- that is what he does
but in some ways I'm disappointed
why doesn't he share this information with me BEFORE the guy gets here?

anyway, it is very interesting
Tom tells me that the monitors that Sandy described that stay on top of the skin
are not nearly as accurate as the ones that go into the skin
none of them are as accurate as the ones that you stick in your finger
(not sure I understand all of that)
but the technology continues to improve


he is working on figuring out all the pieces
he will get a new monitor right away
he will replace his pump in December when insurance approves it
and he will replace the monitor next year when the company comes out with the
new version that connects the two together.

its sort of confusing
but fortunately he has it all figured out

I asked for some explanations so I could help
but he is not very forthcoming

we will go on
tonight he went low again
but he is acknowledging that I have a better sense of him going low
than he does -- he told the sales guy that
its the first time I have EVER heard him admit that to anyone!

maybe that is progress?????

we shall see

October

The blogs have been fairly quiet lately
I guess we have all been very busy lately
I know I have been

And, its Fall
my least favorite season of all
there is so much to do and yet not very much to write
its all sort of like busy work -- frustrating as heck!

Tom's doing fine
its a week to week thing


About to attempt to sleep well tonight

Tom's Doing Better

Well, the update is that Tom is doing much better.
It is clear that the pump was not working properly.
Since he received the new one, I don't think he has gone low

He is also actively pursuing getting his new monitor that synchs with the pump
Of course, it is necessary for me to continue to nag him

I HATE that!
but its better than being in the hospital or police station with him
I guess we have to choose our battles

back to my old saying:  I hope everyone gets a good night sleep tonight
its been a long time since Tom has woken me in hte middle of the night
I'm grateful
but for those of you who have a middle of the night low guy
hang in there
things will change

not sure how
but they will change

good night

I Love Comments

It is very great to receive comments from my on-line friends
Truly you guys get it, even when others don't

Here is Tom's update

Every night since the car incident, he has gone low in the evening
the other night after he recovered, I sat him down and looked him in the eye and said
stop, this is not ok
I am trying to help, not hurt
but he cannot leave me to deal with this like this

his response?  "I'm going to the doctor next week"
me:  Monday?
Tom:  no, Friday, I think
Me:  not, ok.  it is not ok to go low every night between now and next Friday
 you may not live until next Friday.  what can you do between now and then?
Tom:  I don't know
Me:  Is there no one on the face of this earth who can help you?
you can't call your doctor?  there is nothing on the internet?  no one else who has diabetes who has ideas?
is there something wrong with your pumpt?

Tom:  Well,... I have been thinking that the doohicky in my pump may not be working right, maybe I can call them

HUH????

Me:  OK, when are you going to call them?  I think this is important.  and in the meantime, can you use your manual monitor in the meantime?

Tom:  Oh, yeah, maybe I can do that.  I'll call the company first thing in the morning and see what they say.

Follow up -- he received a new part to his pump by Fed Ex the next day and he has been using the manual monitor in the mean time.
To my knowledge he hasn't gone low since.

HMPH.  why does he have to make it more complicated?
oh, I know, we have the answer to that.
but geez, really?
maybe tomorrow I won't worry so much when he is driving home.

GRRR!

Is it just me?  ok, I know its not.

Just about every night since the night Tom had the major failure driving a couple of Friday's ago
He has gone low before dinner -- too low
Tonight he arrived home confused and dazed
he "forgot" to do a few errands,  what?
his explanation:  he ate a candy bar before he left work and thought that would be enough
on a good day, its an hour drive - today with the weather it was way over an hour
and he is a high-stress driver - by choice

when I asked him what he is going to do to fix things
he said he just didn't know
he was doing everything he knew to do
I said that wasn't good enough
he needed to figure something out
what if he had another accident and lost his ability to drive?
was there no one on earth who could help him?

he finally admitted to me that he has a doc apptment next week
why was that so hard to tell me?

really what is wrong with him?
I mean other than the diabetes?
he doesn't understand that I have to live through this also!

and yet, its weird, I'm worried and angry, but separated
this is his issue not mine
he has to address it
I can't fix it
so I'm in the place of nowhere
I can't fix it, I can't do anything but watch the crisis build
every day another tile is added to the stack
eventually they are all going to fall over
I guess I will have to pick them up
I will have to deal with it then