His Driver's License

So, I received this question..... Hey...not sure who posted the five accident story...my question??? Didn't the state intervene i.e. taking his license??? We battled that 2 or so years ago and it was a small accident but had a PA say he should not drive...diabetics have to drive...anyway got his DR. to help out...but I live in fear every time he leaves the driveway...in fact two reactions today and I cooked all three meals...what the #?##... I'm not sure whether or not you are referring to my story but a long time ago, Tom had a bad accident while "in a low" he got onto a freeway entrance ramp going the wrong direction (still don't know how he did that!) he was going slowly so no one was injured but after the cars were all crashed he left the scene the cops thought he was drunk - it was 6:30 in the morning the state cops called me at home and told me there was an all points bulletin out for him (just like on tv!) and this was before cell phones we had no idea where he was until he called me from a gas station when the cops found him they weren't very nice to him the judge was not nice to either of us this is a long way to say to that we had to address the issue of whether or not he would be able to keep his drivers license and that was when he was only 40 years old The impact on our lives would be impossible how would he work if he can't drive we live and work in the suburbs he drives an hour each way to work if he couldn't drive how would he get to and from work! but if he can't drive (because he is low) he won't be around to work! its hard there are no magic answers except that I have to keep reminding him its his job, not mine he needs to do a better job And just because, this is funny -- we can all relate...another note... ...last week when I raced to the eye dr. when hubby was having a reaction...I grabbed up all the tubes of glocose tablets available...he took two or three and things were ok...anyway noticed that one tube..orange flavored had specks on them...wondered if they could be going bad... just mentioned it to hubby...he ever so kindly told me that tube of glocuse tablets I bought and tried to give him were actually fiber tablets...they look like glocose to me...anyway in my furvor to help I could have killed himmm...I swear it was an accident but plan to be more careful when making this purchase...just wanted to help someone laugh today...as my best friend told me that day... "I won"... take care, have a good night,

Lots of Response - So Helpful

I asked and you responded
thank you from the bottom of my heart
all of your comments are posted -- here are a few and my thoughts:

DW wrote this and it touched my heart:

you have the right to just want a little PEACE! You not only have the right...you deserve it...so take it...a couple of weeks ago you told me to let go...I'm trying...now you try...enjoy that wine and the book...you do not have control over him...you can only do so much then God takes over


Michael offered this:

All I can say is I'm sorry he's being the way he is, Low or not. Hope the wine does the trick. I know for me, salad and salmon certainly wouldn't bring me out of a Low - some OJ might temporarily, but I need the carbs in my system to make my BGs stay up there in safer levels. Of course, Your Diabetes May Vary. Anyhow, regardless - best thoughts and prayers your way.

Thanks, Michael. I wrote, drank, read my book, and slept -- so yes it was better.

the OJ brought up his glucose; the salad and salmon was to keep him going until he could manage himself
he didn't know I put breadcrumbs on the salmon -- but I did
you are correct, its the carbs every time
but the short-term and long-term ones count.
your comments are great, thank you for them.

NewToThis -- you are such a sweetie -- you sustain me:

Any time. I have my glass of wine too. I raise it to you, "an amazing wife who deserves to be reminded just how amazing she it."



Sandy, thank you too, I've been through oh, 5 car accidents? after so many years, it never gets easier. maybe that's the worst part....

I understand. I used to stress when my hubby worked (he worked on the road driving all day) many time I would catch him in a low episode and have to "treat it" over the phone. Not an easy task! The final straw was when he actually did have an accident. I was on the phone off and on through the entire episode. Talk about crazy scary!!!!!!!!!! Hang in there


Lilly, maybe I should copy your more insightful note, but you make me giggle, I think I love you

Maybe a second glass of wine would help . . . :-)




so, tonight, as Tom is doing everything in the world he can to make it up to me
and all I want to do is sleep
your comments sustain me
as DW wrote earlier
and probably each of us has written at one point or another
it is so fabulous that we have found each other
there must be many more of us out there and still all I can think of to say is:
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU

now, it is close to 9 o'clock on Friday nite
and I'm going to bed in a few minutes
I'll read and fall asleep
and frankly can't think of a better way to spend a Friday night

I wish every one of you a peaceful sleep also
its the one thing I never get enough of

Tom's Wife

tears to my eyes

thank you for your prompt responses, Lilly and NewToThis
(read them in the comments)

it really helps and I have had my glass of wine
now I'm going to put my PJs on
and going up to bed

I'm sure I won't sleep until he gets home
but I feel better
knowing I have others who understand

thank you so much......

thank you for your comments

everyone please read the comments
there are some very good ones!

Sarah says she hasn't seen these issues with her 20+ year type 1 diabetes
well, all I can says is, that is wonderful and I am so happy for her

but that is not my life

I have been out of my town for 3 nites, each nite, I called and spoke to Tom and he was fine
Tonite I walked in at 7 pm
and what did I find?

a blithering idiot

after a full glass of OJ and a salad with salad dressing that I forced on him
his glucose reading was 81

but he was so intent on leaving for playing tennis that it didn't matter whether he was too low
and I can't continue to argue
I am so tired from my travel
I'm sorry to say that I just don't care

I pushed the OJ and salad on him
I rushed and made some salmon for him
I didn't want to eat that -- but I had some in the freezer and I cooked it for him
he ate some
then complained that it was too much to eat before playing tennis
so he left - got in his car and drove away
I will now not be able to stop worrying until he gets home

yes, I know, some of you may say
that at least he exercises
but really, at the risk to sugar lows?

I can't help it, I was angry
I just wanted to come home
have a glass of wine
and a quiet nite at home
put on my PJs
and read in bed

now I'm so agitated
and I just can't relax until he gets home
and that won't be for several hours

how do I know that he won't kill someone driving his car?

this may be dramatic
but it is my feelings
and I'm allowed to have feelings

right?
your support will be helpful tonight because I'm feeling very low.....

Needles? Just Can't Do 'Em

NewToThis tells me: A needle is nothing. Really..... It's just a Thin, little piece of metal. Don't look. Just jab and press. If you're shaking try and remember something mean he said when he was in a nasty mood and give it to him - hard! I bet you will both feel better when it's over in my head I get that, but when I tried, it just didn't work In fact, the one time I did try, Tom flipped over and his arm swung out (to protect himself) and I ended up with a black eye that sounds bad, I know, but really, he was so out of it, he had no idea that he hit me this was a very long time ago, and I never tried to give him a shot again its a good thing that I don't have kids I don't know what I would do if I had to take them in for shots or --OMG-- have to give one to my own kid!! there are only so many things I'm willing to do that just isn't one of them and, really, that is so his job its bad enough I help him with the OJ if he is in such bad shape that he can't drink? well he needs the EMTs anyway and, by the way? last night I slept so well, I overslept this morning! was late for work, but that's not the end of the world either

glucogon - is that the shot?

Tom's doc tried to give us one of those shot things early on
is that what Lilly is talking about?

When he is between 17 to 20, yes . . . you have to do something before he passes out. That is, if he can still swallow at that point! Is he actually still capable of yelling at you at that point? Do you have glucagon injections in the house? Or even frosting in small tubes? I know this sounds gross, but I have had my hubby get to the point a couple times where he was so out of it he could not swallow or suck from a straw, and at that point, frosting can actually work, as it dissolves in the mouth. The gel kind would probably be even better, but have never had it on hand. Another time, the glucagon was home and there was no sugary frosting, so I was literally holding his head back and drizzling soda down his throat. He did finally come around, but the whole episode made for a hell of a family Christmas! My next step was going to be calling the ambulance. This was after he had screamed at me all the way to my brother's house for almost half an hour, and then was so "out of it" I couldn't get him out of the car when we got there. Was I enabling him? More like making sure he survived! Never a dull moment.

I tried, I really did.
but of all the things I have done for him, putting a needle into him is one thing I cannot do
when he is so far gone that he cannot swallow or suck from a straw,
I call 911
He HATES that more than anything
and frankly, the emergency folks don't love it either -- although they are nice about it
but there are times when I reach my limit
he is beyond my ability to help
and frankly the fact that he hates it is not such a bad thing
as long as i don't over do it

Oh, and can I tell you about the time his mother called 911 from 1,000 miles away?
I was upstairs - having a nice time, reading, taking a shower, whatever,
had no idea what he was doing downstairs

suddenly, the doorbell rang
it was the EMTs
my MIL (who is evil by the way) had called while I was in the shower and tried talking to Tom
she decided he needed help and figured out how to call the local police station
they called the EMTs who showed up
in that instance, Tom was not that bad,
I could have helped him

but oh, well,

I really appreciate the EMTs
its nice to know they are there
since I can't use the shot thing
needles are not my thing

this kind of rambled
sorry
but the idea of the shots and EMTs got me started
thanks Lilly